Monday, October 20, 2008

Thoughts on Today's Gospel

This morning's Gospel reading from Luke included the parable of the greedy landowner who had more harvest than he could store, so he decided to build a bigger barn. But God came to him that very night and told him his time was up... fool, to whom will your grain go now?

Father talked about how greed often manifests itself in "hording," and not just material possessions. We can horde ourselves, our time, our willingness to sacrifice for others.

I've been struggling with this a lot lately. Our schedule is so busy this fall. I had gotten into a healthy routine of weekly time away (usually 7pm Tues mass, followed by an evening with friends or by myself) last year, but that just doesn't fit in this year. I thought the "compromise" would be daily mass. I love daily mass, but 25 minutes when I am sleepy and not in my most aware frame of mind is not an equal substitute for an evening each week that I can count on. And so, I've been stingy with my attention, my care for DH and the kids, as well as others.

I see the strain of it coming out in my pettiness, in selfishness, in my unwillingness to serve. I feel like no time is "mine" and so I horde the little time that I do have, rather than selflessly sharing it with those I love most. Father pointed out that none of this is "mine"... this life I have is God's life. I am just the steward of it. So, be generous with it... share it with all.

I'm going to work on that one this week.

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