Waiting

I've been caught between two different types of waiting this Advent. First, there's the joyful anticipation of Christ's coming (both the celebration of his first coming as an infant and the preparation for his second coming). The other waiting is the anxiety-ridden wait to learn whether or not my husband still has employment.

In the beginning, the second waiting was more theoretical than actual, and was easily overshadowed by the joyful, Christ-centered waiting. In fact, I think I've done a pretty good job this Advent in keeping our focus Christ-centered, and in enjoying the pace of Advent rather than rushing headlong into "Christmas" long before Dec. 25.

But this week, with the announcement on Monday of 1400 layoffs, and the confirmation from my husband's new VP that there would be layoffs in his department, the second, anxiety-ridden wait has stepped to the forefront.

This week has been a difficult one. We've watched as people we know (and friends/relatives of people we know) have found themselves suddenly jobless. As the week has gone by, our fears have risen. And we still know nothing. From this place, on Friday evening, it looks to be next Wednesday at the earliest that we will know his employment status.

And so we wait. And we try to keep our focus where it truly belongs. We will try to put aside the fears for this weekend, so that we can enjoy our kids, enjoy cutting down our Christmas tree and pulling out the precious ornaments, enjoy this time together as a family making memories we all will treasure always.

Maybe it's fitting that this Sunday is Gaudete Sunday... the pause amidst the waiting to rejoice in the knowledge that we are awaiting our Savior. I pray that we will be able to shift our focus this weekend back to a Christ-centered one. I pray that we will be able to surrender to whatever will happen, and just trust that all will work out as God has ordained.